Festus' Potential Victim:

Joyce Nelson The lovable Joyce is a 50 year old widow.  She's looking for a lover that won't blow her cover.  What is her cover, you ask?  She's really a 27 year old man.
About the scammer:
Names:  Festus Isidahomen / Joseph Smith
Email:  olanban007@yahoo.com
Location: Lagos, Nigeria
Telephone:  +2348034923101
Profile:  MySpace
Note:  Best scammer name ever.


Hello my name is Festus, I saw your profile and i like it and i would love to know you more. My email address is olanban007@yahoo.com or festy4u2000@hotmail.com, send me an email and tell me more about yourself if you are interested in me.
Looking forward to hear from you.
Festus.


Festus: Hello Dear
Festus: how are you doing?
Joyce:  Hello
Joyce:  I'm fine.  How are you?
Festus: i'm doing great
Festus: I'm Festus
Joyce:  Lovely name
Joyce:  I'm Joyce
Festus: Nice to meet you
Joyce:  Nice to meet you too
Festus: can you tell me more about yourself?
Joyce:  What would you like to know?
Festus: I like to know what you do for living
Festus: what you do at your spare time
Joyce:  I work as a book supplier
Joyce:  In my spare time I enjoy reading and farming, and reading about farming
Festus: that's nice
Festus: how you alone?
Joyce:  What do you mean?
Festus: do you live home alone?
Joyce:  Yes
Joyce:  Just me and my dog
Festus: hiya
Joyce:  What?
Festus: if only i was there for you
Joyce:  What is hiya?
Festus: it's mean exclamation
Joyce:  Yeah.  That's a karate expression
Joyce:  They say it as they break bricks or pieces of wood
Festus: yes
Joyce:  So are you a ninja?
Festus: ninja?
Joyce:  A masked karate assailant
Festus: no
Festus: i watch ninja movies alot
Joyce:  Cool
Joyce:  Who would win in a fight?  Jet Li or Jackie Chan?
Festus: Jet li has more experince than Jacki Chan
Joyce:  That's just ridiculous
Festus: I’m looking for someone to spend my life with; someone to spend as well broad spring as dark autumn evenings, someone who can give love, consideration and hugs. I feel its time to settle down and raise a family of my own.
Joyce:  That's nice
Joyce:  I'm looking for all that stuff
Festus: I'm calm, simple, loving, passionate, emotional, caring and honest single man ansd i have the sense of humor. I appreciate honest and friendly people around me. On spare time, apart from cooking and swimming, I try to exercise, play music, dance or sing. I like nature but also romantic dinner at home or at restaurant or go to cinema and most of all I love travelling .
Joyce:  Cool.  It's like you're reading the memoir that exist only in my brain
Festus: yes
Festus: what city are you really from?
Joyce:  Wilmington, NC
Festus: USA?
Joyce:  Yes
Festus: nice to meet you
Joyce:  Nice to meet you too
Festus: What your phone number?
Joyce:  You don't need that now
Festus: ok
Festus: but you can have mine
Joyce:  ok
Festus: cuz you made me to fall in love with you
Festus: +2348034923101
Joyce:  Really?
Joyce:  That's nice of you to say
Festus: yes
Festus: I feel like jumping into the plane now to meet you
Festus: I don't know how i'm feeling now
Joyce:  At least you aren't jumping from the plane to meet me
Joyce:  That could be dangerous
Festus: Here I go allowing all to know that I have a desire and want to be closer to you
Joyce:  Thanks for that.  I made me feel icky inside
Festus: I hope you have my number with you
Joyce:  Yes
Joyce:  You just gave it to me
Festus: I feel like to hear your voice
Joyce:  Chatting on here is good for now
Festus: ok
Festus: Your wish is my command
Festus: I will keep loving you as long as the sun keeps shining, the stars keep brightening the sky, the winds keep blowing, the snow keeps falling, and the flowers keep smiling  
Joyce:  That's nice.  Are you a poet?
Joyce:  or a writer?
Festus: I'm not
Festus: But i like peom
Joyce:  Yeah.  Peom good
Festus: The world has many beauties, some like lilies, jasmine, irises, roses; some were just simple plain flowers, none of them made me feel attracted
Festus: LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU
Festus: I have to say it
Joyce:  I love you too
Joyce:  You're very kind to me
Festus: I have fallen in love with you
Joyce:  Yes.  I get the point
Festus: That's me
Festus: KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES KISSES
Joyce:  You are so sweet and adorable
Festus: Thanks LOve
Festus: Inside of me there is a place where my sweetest dreams reside, where my highest hopes are kept alive, where my deepest feelings are felt and where my favorite memories are safe and warm 
Festus: I find that you're on my mind than any other thought now.
Joyce:  Thank you very much
Festus: Do you know that you made me fall in Love with you
Joyce:  Thanks.  I love you too
Festus: You so sweet and nice
Joyce:  So are you
Festus: Sweetie, I really want this our relationship to be forever
Joyce:  Me too
Festus: What do you think?
Joyce:  Forever and ever
Festus: Yes
Festus: I will be happy with you
Festus: Stay and do things together
Joyce:  I will like that too
Joyce:  I'm sorry but I will need to sign off now
Festus: Why Sweetie?
Festus: Where you going to?
Joyce:  I need to start cooking dinner
Festus: ok
Festus: What your time there?
Joyce:  It's 7:20 pm
Festus: ok
Festus: Here is 12:20am
Festus: But i can still wait for you
Joyce:  It'll be a while
Joyce:  I may not come back
Joyce:  until tomorrow
Festus: Cuz i have fallen in love with
Joyce:  Will you be online tomorrow?
Festus: Then when you are online just give call so that i can come online with you
Joyce:  I enjoyed chatting you tonight
Joyce:  Take care
Festus: me too
Festus: I will Missed you tonight
Joyce:  I'll miss you too
Joyce:  Goodnight
Festus: Then when you are online just give call so that i can come online with you

Three days later...


Festus: hello Love
Festus: How are you doing?
Joyce:  Hello
Joyce:  I'm fine.  How are you?
Festus: I'm doing great
Festus: I have meeb missing you
Festus: been
Joyce:  Me too
Joyce:  I haven't seen you online in a few days
Festus: But we both misses each other
Festus: I have been online
Joyce:  Oh okay
Festus: If only i have your phone number to reach you
Joyce:  I would prefer we just chat on here
Festus: Just to hear your voice
Festus: I will be the happieast man on Earth
Joyce:  Let's just keep this on Yahoo Messenger for now
Festus: ok
Festus: So, what have you write about now?
Joyce:  What do you mean?
Festus: I mean about me
Festus: since we met
Joyce:  You are very nice and I enjoy chatting with you
Festus: Thanks
Festus: What your religion?
Joyce:  Christian
Festus: Penticostal or Catholic?
Joyce:  Neither
Joyce:  I am a Jedi
Festus: ok
Festus: Did you Dream about me?
Festus: Cuz i dreamt about you
Joyce:  I don't remember my dreams because of my medication
Festus: ok
Festus: I couldn't sleep last night
Festus: I was thinking about you
Joyce:  That's very sweet
Festus: Yes
Festus: I always want to have you close to me all night
Festus: But distance don't allow me
Joyce:  Yes.  I understand
Festus: BUt in my HEART you are very close
Joyce:  I feel the same way about you
Festus: Can you permit me to say something
Joyce:  yes
Festus: I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU
Joyce:  lol
Joyce:  I love you too
Festus: I was really thinking of beeing with you
Festus: Holding each other close to our body
Joyce:  Yes.  And go-cart riding later in the day
Festus: yes
Festus: I can't wait till that day to come
Joyce:  Me too
Festus: Then we have to make good plans for my trip
Joyce:  Okay.
Joyce:  I'll let you plan that
Joyce:  Whenever you decide to do that
Festus: I feel like jumping into the plane to meet you now
Joyce:  Just let me know
Joyce:  and we will decide together
Festus: When will you like me to come over to you?
Joyce:  Where do you plan on staying?
Festus: I plan to stay with you for the rest of my life
Joyce:  Good answer
Festus: I will ask you which is the nearest airport close to you
Joyce:  There is only one airport in the city
Joyce:  Wilmington International Airport
Joyce:  ILM
Festus: ok
Festus: I have to make save now
Joyce:  Okay.  Great idea
Festus: Sweetie, I just little assistance from you
Joyce:  What do you mean?
Festus: I have been taking care of kids that are motherless
Festus: So one of the kids is celebrating his Birthday by weekend
Joyce:  Oh.  That's nice
Joyce:  How old?
Festus: His just 3 years
Festus: I don't have much on me to celebrate with him and others
Joyce:  It's okay
Joyce:  3 years old is too young to know what a birthday is
Joyce:  He will not even know it's his birthday
Festus: Yes
Festus: But i just want to make him happy and don't think as if no mother
Joyce:  He doesn't even know what's going on
Festus: Yes
Joyce:  Children are so stupid at that age.
Joyce:  He probably doesn't even know his own name
Festus: you know that you can still celebrate a year old baby birthday
Joyce:  Yeah, but it's not necessary
Festus: Ye
Festus: But i have made up my mind to celebrate with him
Festus: ok
Joyce:  Okay
Joyce:  Good for you
Festus: try to understand me
Festus: How much can you send me to celebrate with the baby?
Joyce:  I don't know
Joyce:  How much are you asking for?
Festus: Just 150USD
Joyce:  For a baby's birthday???
Festus: Yes
Festus: and for their feeding and clothing
Joyce:  I don't understand why you are asking me for money
Festus: not just for him alone
Joyce:  Do you not have a job?
Festus: i don't now
Festus: I would have done it myself
Festus: ok
Festus: Try to understand me
Joyce:  I'm trying to understand you
Joyce:  Why don't you have a job?
Festus: I lost my job cuz of the kids
Festus: I don't regret
Joyce:  So why are you celebrating with the ones that cost you your job?
Festus: Cuz they are the future leaders
Joyce:  Oh okay
Joyce:  Future leaders could probably cause some trouble for you later on
Festus: Yes
Festus: So, how much can you help with?
Joyce:  Usually I don't condone blackmail, but this kid's future leadership could mean doom for all of us later on in life
Joyce:  How much did you ask for again?
Festus: You can help me with a 100usd
Joyce:  Do you plan on paying me back?
Joyce:  or are you just asking for a donation or something?
Festus: Yes
Festus: I'm going to pay you back
Joyce:  Okay. That's not too bad
Joyce:  Only if you swear to God on your life that you will repay me
Festus: Sorry, I'm considering it as donation
Joyce:  So you do not plan on paying me back?
Festus: Only God can reward you back
Joyce:  I think I'll pass
Joyce:  I don't donate without a tax write-off slip
Festus: Ok
Joyce:  Sorry
Festus: So, without tax slip you don't donate?
Joyce:  Correct
Festus: ???
Joyce:  Correct
Joyce:  It means 'you are right'
Festus: ok
Festus: Are you sending it or not?
Joyce:  Not unless I'm being paid back
Festus: OK
Joyce:  are you sure?
Festus: But i have told that i don't work now
Festus: what you saying now is conditions
Joyce:  Yes
Joyce:  Two conditions
Joyce:  conditions
Joyce:  ... no
Joyce:  Three conditions
Joyce:  #1.  You pay me back within a reasonable time period
Joyce:  #2.  This is a one time only thing. 
Joyce:  #3.  You swear to God on your life you will repay me
Festus: I will abide with those conditions
Joyce:  okay
Joyce:  You can do #3 now
Festus: Yes
Joyce:  okay.. waiting
Festus: ok
Joyce:  are you going to do it?
Festus: I swear to God on my Life that i will repay you back
Joyce:  Good
Joyce:  I believe you.  I don't think anyone would say that if they did not mean it
Festus: ok Sweetie
Joyce:  Okay
Festus: So, how are you sending the money?
Joyce:  I don't know
Joyce:  What do you suggest?
Festus: You can send it through Western Union
Joyce:  Okay.  No problem.
Festus: When can you send the money
Joyce:  When do you need it?
Festus: I need immediately
Joyce:  I thought you said the birthday wasn't until the weekend?
Festus: yes
Festus: but i need the money for the prepation
Joyce:  Maybe tomorrow
Joyce:  I'll try to do that in the morning
Festus: ok sweetie
Joyce:  ok
Festus: I hope you have my informations in sending the money?
Joyce:  no
Joyce:  What information do I need?
Festus: Name: Joseph Smith
Festus: Address: 44A FAIRLAWN COURT,
CHARLTON LONDON SE7 7DS
UNITED KINGDOM
Festus: That's my name and Address
Festus: you have all now?
Joyce:  Your name?
Joyce:  I thought you were Festus
Festus: Yes
Festus: That's my brother's name
Festus: Joseph
Festus: My real name is Festus
Joyce:  How come your brother has a different last name?
Festus: That's middle name
Joyce:  Okay.  That makes sense
Festus: Yes
Joyce:  Got it
Festus: Good
Festus: I look forward to hear from you tomorrow
Festus: ok
Joyce:  okay
Festus: When do you want me to come online tomorrow
Joyce:  Check tomorrow morning
Joyce:  I'll email you the claims details
Festus: I love you Dear
Joyce:  I love you too
Festus: Are you going to sleep now?
Joyce:  It's only 6:30
Festus: ok
Festus: I thought you needed some rest
Joyce:  Well, I do need to sign off soon anyways and start cooking
Festus: ok
Festus: me too
Festus: talk to you later
Joyce:  Okay
Joyce:  I'll miss you
Festus: me too
Festus: Bye for now
Joyce:  Bye

Late that night, I sent the following email to Festus...


Hello Festus,

I'm sorry if I'm late.  I have sent the money and here's the claims details you will need.

MTCN:  7003681580
Sender:  Joyce Nelson / 615 N. Front St. / Wilmington, NC 28403
Receiver:  Joseph Smith / 44A Fairlawn Court / Charlton, London,  SE7 7DS / United Kingdom 23401
Test Question:  Where do we chat?
Answer:  Yahoo
Amount:  $150

I hope to chat with you again later after work.  Take care.

Love always,

Joyce


Early the next morning, Festus came online to receive the Western Union claims info.  The appreciative scammer left the following offline messages...


Festus Isidahomen (7/7/2007 5:34:39 AM): Hello Love
Festus Isidahomen (7/7/2007 5:38:50 AM): Thanks for the money you sent to me
Festus Isidahomen (7/7/2007 5:38:59 AM): I'm very grateful
Festus Isidahomen (7/7/2007 5:39:06 AM): I hope to chat with you soon

Festus then left and took his fake claims info to Western Union.  He returned and left the following offline messages...

Festus Isidahomen (7/7/2007 8:34:30 AM): I just want to tell you something
Festus Isidahomen (7/7/2007 8:34:42 AM): I don't need your money anymore
Festus Isidahomen (7/7/2007 8:35:33 AM): ok
Festus Isidahomen (7/7/2007 8:35:58 AM): some one came with the money he borrowed from me
Festus Isidahomen (7/7/2007 8:37:02 AM): Use your money yourself
Festus Isidahomen (7/7/2007 8:37:12 AM): Thanks for your effort
Festus Isidahomen (7/7/2007 8:37:15 AM): bye


A message from James Pruitt:

Unfortunately, that was the last I heard from Festus. He may have blocked me or he may have abandoned the ID (I sent a friend request from another ID, but no response).

I'm not totally sure what happened to to him at the Western Union.  I have three different theories:

1.  He went to the Western Union, attempted to claim the money, and he was rejected.   Somewhere in between the Western Union and the cafe, he asked someone why he was unable to claim the money.  The person probably was one of the nearly 150 scammers I have encountered.  This wouldn't be the first time this has happened.  (Sunday Smith / Grek Desmond once tipped off another scammer while I was chatting with him.  Look for that transcript, along with others that didn't end according to plan, in an upcoming blog update)

2.  The Western Union employee told him.  You would think a lot of these scammers are going to the same place, and using the same fake number, and being turned away by the same employees.  Unless, of course, the Western Union employees are as clueless as the scammers.

3.  Festus was a repeat.  He fell for the same joke twice, but he didn't know until the Western Union rejection.  He knew coming back to chat with me would only bring on further humiliation.

I never got to add insult to injury, so the inended punchline will be saved for another scammer.  Still, he was publicly humiliated, so I can still do my victory dance...